Saturday, April 28, 2007
♥10:47 AM
your deviant dreams.my
beloved saturday is here once again, dependable eh , yet deep down i know this
pure joy will
never stay here for too long. soon, it will go away,
replaced with another type of emotion. somehow the knowledge that school is going to open in less then fourtyeight hours away;s making me feel sick. -_- same old same old, this
omg-its-saturday!-but-monday-gonna-come-soon-enough-so-now-im-no-longer-happy-but-sick feeling would be a cycle
, repeated every saturday morning. hur! jee, i cant wait to see how long i can hold on before this paranoia catch up and i;ll prolly have a seizure by then. theres something about living your life in singapore thats stupefyingly mundane. we;re all superficial and selfish. gahh something someone said makes me think of the people i hold dear in my life. you know the cheesy lines people utters like,
i;ll die for you? well i;ve come up with a list of people i would
definately die for and well, i'll give away ten years of my life span even if it will only add another year to theirs.
(a)maternal grandmother.
(b)maternal grandfather.
(c)mother.
(d)father.
yes, this is quite immature of me but these people, theyre too precious. paradoxically, most of the time im ungreatful and always breaking their hearts and disappointing them, its really disgusting but yes, i will die for them, every one of them.
Are things rewinding
Or skipping ahead?
Or are they playing back something that already happened
I don't know what is fake
I can't tell what is real
I can't tell by just seeing
I can't find out from what I feel
Maybe when we die
We'll see we were always alive
xoxo
umairah ali bafana