what about the boy that jumped that day.


time needs to stop pronto.suddenly its sunday, and i've barely registered anything educational or morally upright to this thing on my head that everyone been trying to convinced me called the brain. late nights have been neverending lectures from all sorts of people with only one objective. let go of depression.thats the most preposterous thought anyone could have. if i let go of it it means i need to be happy with the world, see this is a problem by itself. i am not happy neither do i see any need to be happy to the world.

depression is as bad as those out there thats are onehunderedpercent fake, you can go on living in denial but people do get angry,jealous and plain nasty but with that fake smile on your face twentyfour seven, who're you trying to kidd.humans are not saints, get over it.go tell them to stop being fake and we see what theyre left with. i will probably say the suicide number would increase dramatically as people cant really stand their true self anymore they need to pretend so not only would the world like them, but so that they could sleep soundly at night with the thought that theyre accepted by the society as lullaby. so if humans would let go of their masks for just one day, i'll give depression go.

im just bitter.

i still dont see whats the big hoooha over the new ikea. yeahh sure its in the east, stragicallylocated but whats the need of heading there on the first day.that goddamn big building sure aint gonna vanish the next day.so that beats all the rational reasons hell out of my brain.but what can i say, my familys not any better.but atleast i can take consolation that they went three days after opening day.

i'm looking forward to the one week trip although im still undecided on a few main stuff. the trip should be good for my sanity, or whats left of it.i cant imagine being messed up when im thousands miles away from home although it probably would not be the first time. every longdistance holiday trip ends up with me feeling like shit that i rather be send back home then anything else.

i read this one fourhunderdplus storybook today that make me start thinking at about what point do somebody stop asking for help and take justice to their own hands. what do you do when someone have overstepped the boundries. all it take's nineteen minutes for revenge, to put a halt to the world.

xoxo
ciaobella

umairah ali bafana
we all need something we consider worth getting up in the morning for.whether it's real or not, healthy or destructive, tangible or false, is irrelevant. when you've got nothing to hang onto, deception can seem pretty inviting.

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